2.5 week update...

i have always thought that child birth would be the toughest and most painful experience i would go through.  but looking back, it is easy compared to the challenges you face once you get home.  there is such a learning curve to parenting.  things that i thought that would come natural to me, just don't...they take practice, lots of it!  each day brings a new challenge and we are learning as we go.  there truly is nothing that can prepare you for all the emotions you will feel.

i have always been on time, a great multi-tasker and on top of my shit...not so much anymore.  i feel like superwoman if i am able to take a shower or grab a quick bite to eat and i am doing real well if i can get out of the house, let alone before noon!!!  i have learned that i need to lower my goals and expectations of myself, at least for the time being.  i so badly want to have dinner ready for jarad when he gets home and have a clean house, but those tasks can be hard to do when you have a crying baby or if she wants to feed every hour.  thank goodness jarad is so understanding and patient, he is so helpful when he gets home from work and will take bowie so that i can have some time to myself, or take a shower or do what i need to do.  i have a whole new respect for single parents!  it was so nice to have my family here for the last two weeks, but now that it is only me during the days, i am taking baby steps to create my new normal.

 let me start with breastfeeding.  right before we left the hospital we had a meeting with a lactation consultant.  at the time, your milk has not come in and you are only feeding your baby colostrum.  they helped me with getting bowie to properly latch, but i was so new at it, i had no idea what issues we would face in the upcoming days at home.  my milk didn't come in until day 5 (anything between day 3-5 is normal) and it came in at full force.  i had to pump to relieve myself as well.  she was feeding every 3-4 hours.  and in between feedings she would sleep like a little angle.  well this didn't last long, and no matter what, night time is a whole different story.  the day my mom left (exactly 2 weeks old) bowie started to fed every hour or even more frequently.  i put a call into the lactation specialist from the hospital and they said she is going through a growth spurt.  it is very overwhelming to think about getting out of the house when you are feeding, burping and changing your baby every hour.  i didn't even have time to shoot off an email or respond to a text.  now as the week is coming to an end, the feedings are stretching out a bit, and the best thing i did for myself was i went to a la leche meeting.  it is a support group for breast feeding mothers.  i went for three hours and left with some good information, resources and met some first time moms who have invited me to hang out with them for "mommy happy hour."  this has truly been the best thing i have done for myself since moving to washington, i left the meeting feeling confident, encouraged and empowered.  breastfeeding is hard, but the reward of her falling asleep on my chest and napping together is a special time for both of us.  and then the occasional milky smile is heart melting.

lets be honest...i love sleep and i love naps!  i don't consider myself to be either a morning or night person, but now sleep feels like my long lost friend.  all bets are off at night.  some nights bowie will go 3 hour stretches between feedings, but that is about as long as it goes, and more often than not it is more like every 1.5 - 2 hours.  i do my best to not wake jarad up, but sometimes she is just hangry or gassy and i have a crying baby on my hands.  we have tried a few different sleeping arrangements and what is working for us now is to have the nursing glider in our room, it feels lonely to fed in the empty nursery and she sleeps in a bassinet by my side of the bed.  what works best is to swaddle her right after her last bedtime feeding and put her in the bassinet and turn on the vibration on it.  we also tried the mamaroo, but she seems to only like that set up downstairs.  there are times when she is fussy and i bring her into bed and snuggle with her.  but we are not practicing co-sleeping and i find that i sleep better when she is in the bassinet.  the first two weeks were a blur, i was exhausted and after i fed her in the morning my mom would take her and let me go back to bed.  i would also catch a nap in the afternoon, which is amazing!  these days, i am only able to nap in the late afternoon and i usually fall into a deep sleep for 1-2 hours.  i learned that newborns sleep cycle is half of what an adults is.  so when a newborn wakes up it is before we hit our REM sleep, which is a big reason we are so tired because we never get the good deep, restful sleep we need.  they say you get used to the no sleep thing, i am not sure about that, but you learn how to manage.

i have heard that you don't need a lot for newborns and i would say this is pretty much true.  but there are a few things that you do need right away that i wouldn't have thought.  here is some of the things that we have been using a lot of.

~boppy changing pad liners.  we go through a lot of dirty diapers everyday and we have a changing table in the nursery and the pack n play also has a built in changing table.  to protect your changing table mattress and pad you can use these liners and throw them in the wash when they get dirty.  we go through quite a few of them.  and FYI it is not only baby boys that pee when you change their diaper.

~lots of onsies.  baby clothes are super cute, but sometimes they are hard to put on the baby and just not practical.  we prefer the button or zipper up long sleeve pajama style ones.  although we have learned that although bowie is still in newborn clothes, she is starting to get too tall for some of the onesies with feet on them.  the new trend is for "sleep sacks" and we have gotten so many of these, but so far i am not a fan.  i prefer the old fashioned onsies.

~plenty of receiving blankets.   i personally like these better than the muslin ones for swaddling.   we have both, but i use the muslin ones as a cover for feeding, over her car seat as a shade cover or as a light blanket.

~baby carrier.  jarad uses this more than i do, mostly because they can be a bit tricky to put on.  but there are two styles and we have both.  the ergo and a wrap.  it makes going hands free around the house a bit easier.

~pacifiers!!!  this is just a life saver!  they say to get a few types to see what your baby likes, but i have yet to see a baby that didn't like the "avent soothie."  they come 2 to a pack and sell for under $5 at buy buy baby.  be sure to have plenty.  i have them all over the house; bedroom, downstairs, nursery and diaper bag.

~gripe water and vitamin D drops.  the gripe water is to help with gas and the vitamin D drops are recommended for breastfed babies.  i use both daily.

~and lastly, i think a baby bath.  newborns are so small and delicate i would not feel comfortable supporting her with one hand in the sink.  they are big and bulky, but i set it up on the kitchen counter and it comes with a sling for the baby to lay on.  of course you have to have some good bath products to go with it.